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Heidi Chronicles

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DDOL: Books about babies only taught me that most books about babies aren’t about mine.

Filed under: Liam, Mommyhood — Heidi at 7:05 am on Monday, August 29, 2005

I have been thinking a lot lately about babies, since my sis just had Ethan and he’s even more laid back than Em thus far. I am wondering if there’s any hope that my second will be a little easier than L when it comes to some of the things that we’ve struggled with this first year.

Liam is truly what I would consider a “high needs” child when it comes to sleeping. (Thank you ever so much for the lovely term, Dr. Sears.) It’s taken me awhile, but I have finally come to terms with the fact that I haven’t made him this way - he just is.

He is 14 months today and he has slept through the night a total of two weeks the entire 14 months - if I count all of the random nights along the way. However, I am very fortunate that when he doesn’t sleep, he’s pretty happy for the most part, unless he’s sick. I am grateful for that.

L has never been a good sleeper. (He used to take 30 min. naps and I thought it was great if we GOT a nap. Now we get an occasional nap of 3 hours and I don’t really know what to do with myself. And if we’re out of town or trying to get him to sleep somewhere other than his bed, forget about it.) None of the books that I read to try and help was worth a damn. What do you do when your kid doesn’t fit any of the examples in the book? And seriously, he can - and will - cry non-stop through the night if I try to ignore him.

I have been trying to get him to sleep through the night since he was nine weeks old because Babywise said he should. Whatever. Not my kid. Scratch that one off the list.

I also read Dr. Sears and I read Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child. They are fine books, but I’m not a Dr. Sears girl and HSHHC seemed to be thinkly veiled cry-it-out.

Then I read Ferber and tried the Ferberization thing, but it ended up being cry-it-out because he doesn’t respond well to me going into his room to “reassure” him.

I think about Em and Ethan and I’m a little jealous. It’s not that I don’t enjoy Liam. I totally do. I just know what a better mom I am when I get some sleep.

Maybe instead of reading sleep books, I should SLEEP.

4 Comments »

653

Comment by Kyttra

29 August 2005 @ 1:57 pm

Heidi…

I was blessed with sleepers, as you know (4 hour nap everyday). But, there are actually times this cripples us. Because they require so much sleep, I have a NARROW window to accomplish errands, doctors appts, play group, lunch dates. If Darby misses any of her sleep the rest of the night is bad attitude, cranky and TIME OUT city. Yes, second babies seem to be much easier. Fletcher is a breeze. I wish for you an easier second baby. (Also, all my friends here with Boys had it hard the first 3 years…no sleep, clingy, need to be with Mommy, but the older years have been easier than my friends with girls). Maybe Liam will be a cinch when he’s older!

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Comment by Candy

29 August 2005 @ 9:50 pm

well, i’ve heard that no two pregnancies or kids, are exactly alike. with that being said, you have the “tough” kid overwith! Maybe that means your next one will be a major sleeper like my Nathan.

Since n8 is and always has been a great sleeper, i know that i am doomed with this next kid. He or she will probably be more like your sweet Liam! :)

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Comment by Kim

30 August 2005 @ 1:25 am

My friend Amy has 3 sons, 2 of which have not been good sleepers; only 4 week old Josh has been able to sleep without being held…the other two never did as babies. One of the things she tried for Sam was chiropractic care because she noticed that it was like he wasn’t able to get comfortable. It helped, and while he still isn’t sleeping through the night, he is sleeping for longer stretches and waking less. It might be worth looking into.

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Comment by Candy

30 August 2005 @ 4:25 pm

this is why i don’t read books about babies. i really think all of them are a load of crap. (IMHO) They are all marketing schemes. Nothing about being a mother or about MY (or YOUR) particular baby is really ever “revealed” in any books i’ve looked through. I look at it this way, being a mother is something that’s been done since the beginning of time…..most of that time it’s been without “self help” or other “how-to-be-a-good-mom” books. there is no magical answer you’ll find in a book. mommyhood - it’s in our nature…….

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